The internet erupted over the weekend when the story broke about New York law enforcement officers raiding a rescue animal shelter to slaughter an innocent squirrel and raccoon. It’s funny how we all immediately draw partisan battle lines over the most random things. It’s like when you drive past a house with an American flag flying on the front porch—you know exactly who that homeowner is voting for.
Likewise, everyone instantly knew which presidential candidate’s party contributed to the deaths of these rescue animals, and which candidate would promise justice for Peanut the Squirrel and Fred the Raccoon.
Peanut was just a baby when Mark Longo found him beside the road. Peanut’s mother had been hit by a car. Mark took the baby squirrel home, fed him goat’s milk, nurtured him, and raised him to adulthood. Because he had been raised in a safe, domesticated setting, Peanut didn’t know how to survive in the wild on his own. Mark set Peanut free outdoors, but the little squirrel immediately came back home and started scratching at Mark’s window. Peanut was an indoor squirrel from that day forward.
This wacky squirrel became an internet sensation. Mark posted videos online of Peanut leaping off of furniture, the refrigerator, the curtains, and any other high perch he could get to, only to have Mark catch him every time. Mark taught Peanut to hold up little signs on Post-It notes for videos he posted to Instagram. Millions of children and animal lovers from around the world were delighted by the social media antics of Mark and Peanut.
Mark utilized Peanut’s celebrity status to raise money and open an animal rescue shelter that takes care of everything from squirrels to horses in terms of size. It was like the American dream writ large, but with a hilarious squirrel companion.
That all changed when some liberal white b**ch decided to play Karen the Cop.
A liberal white woman who lives in another state called the New York Department of Environmental Conservation and turned him in to the cops for harboring an “illegal” pet squirrel that he hadn’t registered with the government.
What is it with these liberal white ladies who can’t shut up and mind their own business? If you can think of a more vicious member of the human species with a totalitarian bent, we’re curious to know what that would be.
Huffy liberal white women lose sleep if a woman in another state has a diminished opportunity to put her feet up in the stirrups at a Planned Parenthood clinic.
Shut up and mind your own business, liberal white ladies! The 19th Amendment isn’t carved in stone!
Anyway, the New York DEC got a warrant to seize Peanut the Squirrel and sent a dozen heavily armed cops to Mark’s home. Mark and his wife were handcuffed and held outside for five hours like criminals as the cops ripped the interior of their home apart looking for an unauthorized squirrel.
When the cops found Squirrel and nabbed him, the little guy did what any American would do when their civil rights are being viciously violated. He bit one of the cops.
That was all the excuse that the totalitarian government—supported by the likes of Kamala Harris—needed to seize Peanut along with Fred the Raccoon, another rescue pet in the Longos’ home. This next part is a bit graphic, but we include this for Gen Z voters who may not be totally sure how this process works.
Peanut and Fred were both executed so they could be tested for rabies. Once Peanut was dead, they cracked open his skull and removed his brain to conduct a direct fluorescent antibody test to see whether he had rabies. They took Fred’s brain too. Both animals had lived indoors for years and had never been in contact with wild animals. There was zero chance that either of them had rabies.
President Trump, JD Vance, and Donald Trump, Jr., have all condemned the totalitarian actions of the NY DEC as being typical of Democrat Party overreach. President Trump has already vowed to protect the dogs and cats from being eaten by illegal aliens.
Kamala Harris hasn’t said a word about Peanut or Fred, because she approves of what happened to them. With every bone in her body, Kamala supports a government that can march into your home and kill your pets on a whim.
When you go to the polls on Tuesday, understand what you’re voting for.
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 3, 2024
